So how did I spend Sunday you ask ? Well ok let me tell you.

I am not built to run. I'm 48 years old. Heavier than I should be for my height. I have a history of knee and back problems and earlier this year I had a shoulder injury. Despite all of this I decided I would run a half marathon. I trained for 4 months and followed the plan to the letter - apart from the last week where I was told not to run at all. A week before the run I had to go to the physio as the pain in my leg had become impossible to ignore any more. And yet yesterday I ran a half marathon. Yes you read that right. Ok I admit I did plod most of the way round, but I definitely jogged more than walked.

We all woke up early - well apart from Blue Bear who was glued to his pillow until the last minute and yet woke up fresh as a daisy and raring to go. Brown Bear has always been an early riser so he had eaten breakfast and got dressed already. I prepared my kit and bags the night before so I only had to shower and get dressed. I packed warm clothes for afterwards, a towel, Fit Flops, lots of energy bars, water, painkillers and plasters. Hubbie got the boys ready to come and support me and we set off for Hyde Park.

As we made our way to the Macmillan marquee it started to pour with rain. It had been forecast, but I had hoped it wasn't going to happen. Thankfully it stopped as I made my way to the start. Hubbie took the boys to spend the time at the Science Museum, but he was also able to follow me on a tracker app that told him exactly where I was at any time. I set my watch to track the run and took off slowly along a track in Hyde Park that is familiar to me from so many 5k runs in the past.

The route is lined with cheering supporters and it is their encouragement that makes it possible to keep going. As I ran round St James' Park it reminded me of so many lunchtime runs with Soraya and the chats we would have. I felt my face stiffen as I tried to stop tears falling. Then I spotted the fountains where we used to stop and walk a bit and a sign that said 3 miles. It made me smile and I decided not to feel sad about losing her, but to remember the love and friendship we shared. That was literally the only wobble I had. I smiled pretty much the whole way round. People called out, "Keep going Swazi.," "You're doing so well," "Well done Macmillan."

Quite early on I felt severe cramp in my left foot and started to panic that I would have to stop. On Whitehall I leaned against a lamp post to stretch out my foot and a passing runner tapped my shoulder and said, 'keep going' - I did. I took on water at the next water stop (if you're a runner you don't drink, you 'take on water') and felt the cramp ease off. I kept going and it started to feel better, so I found my pace as I ran along the strand. There were well wishers cheering and children holding out their hands for 'high fives' which I did as often as I could.

A few miles in I was feeling the pace and took short walks as and when needed. The Macmillan supporters - and to be fair all other charities too - were amazing. As there were kind folks holding out jelly babies on the route I took a couple and the sugar hit certainly helped me keep going when I felt my legs weaken. At the halfway point the realisation hit me that I had the same again to do. Ok then, let's keep going. The volunteers at the Macmillan water point gave me a huge cheer as I went past and that was such a boost.

The weather was pretty grim, but I didn't mind as some of my training runs had been in downpours so I was used to it and I don't mind getting wet while running. It helps cool down actually. I'm glad I didn't have to run the whole way soaked through. It was grey and drizzly most of the way round then the rain really came down after the ten mile mark. My glasses were useless so I pushed them onto the top of my head and kept going. With just under 2 miles to go I stepped in a puddle (I had successfully avoided doing this so far so it wasn't too disastrous). With a wet foot and no glasses I sent a text to Hubbie to say I was nearly there. It's ok my phone was in a plastic bag - I came prepared for all weathers !

Seeing my boys and Hubbie at Princes Gate (just under a km from the finish line) lifted my spirits so much. The boys ran alongside me on the pavement calling out,
"You can do it Mummy, keep going, 800m left, only 400m left. Come on Mummy you can do it. Just 200m to go ! You did it - well done Mummy."

The leg massage at the end helped a lot. It wasn't until I stopped that I realised how tired I was. Also I was ravenous. I can't eat when I'm nervous so I hadn't eaten at all (apart from medicinal jelly babies of course). Macmillan kindly catered for their runners so I had a sandwich, a bag of crisps and some tea. It barely hit the sides.

When I got home I had some practical things to do for work the next day then I had a hot soak and a glass of prosecco to celebrate. I had done it. After all the hard work of training and the mental preparation to get this done it was over. I've not entirely processed what I did. There are people who do this sort of thing all the time. For me this was a really challenging event. I pushed myself and even on the day I had no idea if I could do it. I'm so grateful to everyone who supported me and wished me well.

I'm having a break from running for a while now. Physio has told me to take at least 2-3 weeks off. I'll go back to swimming and yoga. The stretching and relaxing stuff.

Then Hubbie reminded me that we've signed up to do the Hampton Court half marathon in March. Flippin' 'eck !!

My fitness mad family

Not really skiing - can you tell ? 

We're a fairly active lot in our family. Being outdoors is by far our favourite way to relax and we have lots of ways that we enjoy spending time. Personally I love to swim, ski and me and Hubbie used to play softball before we were parents. I've also taken up Clubbercise recently which is brilliant fun and  is helping my overall fitness too.

Hubbie cycling and Big Boy scootering to school 

At Christmas Hubbie told me he was going to start cycling to work and I had to suppress the giggles as I was so sure he wouldn't do it more than once. Well, he's proven me wrong and has cycled in torrential downpours and has even mastered the steep hills between our house and his office. Some mornings he and Big Boy head off together on their respective wheels.

My little skateboard champ

Big Boy loves all forms of wheeled transport and has been making the case for a skateboard for years now. We did take him to try out some lessons with his friends and he did really well actually. As the weather is improving we will probably do this again. I did promise him he could have a skateboard when he's older, but if he's into it and being safe it may be ok sooner.

Scooter boy 

As an active child Big Boy has been proficient on his microscooter since he was 3 years old. In good weather I take him to school on his scooter and if it's just me and him going anywhere I will take my scooter too. One of his school pals had a birthday party that we rode our scooters to. I remember one of the other mums asking who the trendy mum was and I was delighted to realise it was me she was talking about. That isn't something that's often said about me !

Daddy and Big Boy on the move 

Mummy scooting 

Baby Boy is always trying to run off with his brother's scooter so we decided to see if there was one that would suit him too. The lovely folks at Microscooter recommended their mini 2 go scooter which I have seen toddlers riding when we've been out in the park. It starts off with a seat and a storage box for important soft toys to ride along and then you can remove the seat to make a short handled scooter and eventually raise the handle height until it's pretty much a full size microscooter.

The only time Baby Boy has used his mini 2 go scooter

We took Baby Boy out on his scooter one evening when we were all taking a walk after dinner - I'd love to show you lots of photos of him enjoying riding his fab new scooter, but I'm afraid he's not really interested. Hopefully if we take the seat off he will give it another go as it will be more like his brother's. For now I just have to take photos of the forlorn looking scooter that I pulled along when we went for brunch on Sunday.

Well, we love you mini 2 go

Baby Boy does love his scuttlebug and calls it his 'bike.' The lovely mums at Big Boy's school got together and bought it for him as a welcome gift when he joined our family. He can pick up a head of speed on it and I do have a job keeping up with him.

Off he goes into the distance 

It is great when we go to the park and the boys chase each other round the track. Hopefully once they are both on scooters it's going to be more of an even race.

My boys - off on adventures 

Disclosure: We were sent a mini 2 go scooter by the lovely folks at Microscooters.

Our wonderful wedding anniversary at Village Urban Resorts Farnborough

Sleek and smart looking

For our wedding anniversary we like to do something special so this year we arranged for the boy to stay with my parents and went to stay at the recently refurbished and updated Village Urban Resort Hotel in Farnborough. We haven't stayed at Urban Village Resorts before so we were keen to see what they had to offer for couples and families.

Upper Deck accommodation: 

As we were child-free our room was upgraded to an Upper Deck room which are only available to guests staying without children. The decor is very nice with Sky movies, Starbucks coffee and tea and free wifi.  Hubbie rolled his eyes at the ceiling as he fully expected me to sit in front of the TV the whole time as we don't have Sky movies at home and I love watching films to relax. It was a nice room, but I would have liked a table to sit at. There was a desk which you could work and plenty of plug points, which made Hubbie very happy,  but nowhere to just sit with a drink and a magazine for example. It's only a small thing though. The bathroom had a fantastic rain shower and a handheld attachment that was great as a microphone when singing in the shower. What ? No, we didn't do that *cough*

Snazzy bathroom

And... relax !

Leisure and Spa facilities:

However, the hotel also has great leisure facilities and we were both keen to try these so once we'd unpacked and had a cuppa we went to try out the gym. There is a lot to do here. The gym has a lot of machines, there are fitness suites with a full timetable of classes including spin and zumba and a separate weights room. What really matters to me though is how good the swimming pool is and this one is pretty special. It's 20 m long with proper swimming lanes which is handy as they have lessons for children so it's nice to still be able to swim while this is going on. I had a lovely long swim in the evening before dinner and another before breakfast the following day. There is also a spa with sauna, steam room and jacuzzi to relax in which - if we were staying for the weekend - I'd have spent a lot longer in.

No excuses - loads of room ! 

Food and drink: 

We ate lunch in the Victory Pub which is onsite and it is a proper pub complete with pool table and sports on the TV screens. The food was pub grub at reasonable prices and the staff were very friendly and helpful. In fact everyone we met was great and a credit to the hotel. It really makes a difference when you feel you are being looked after and it's not too much trouble. We were able to relax and enjoy our stay and de-stressed a lot faster than we usually do.

Chops Grill 

Victory Pub

Dinner was in the Chops Grill and the menu is pretty comprehensive with a good wine list by the glass or bottle and non-alcoholic options which is a nice bonus. It was quite busy, but the restaurant wasn't too noisy and the service was great. Attentive, but not too much and the food was very tasty and great value. You can book with dinner and breakfast included which is a good deal as the dinner menu is quite generous with three courses for £29 and you only really pay for drinks and any supplements.

Does what is says on the wall

As you approach it the hotel looks very sleek and modern. It appears quite boxy, but the side wall is a literal menu of services. At VUR Farnborough the hotel offers everything under one roof; accommodation, dining, leisure facilities, etc. and in this case it 'does what it says on the tin.' The hotel has some amazing offers including Friday HideAways and Spa Days - you can find out more about them here: https://www.village-hotels.co.uk/offers/

We had a wonderful anniversary here and would definitely return for a couples only break. There is a lot to do all in one place and it's possible to have a relaxing time without spending a lot of money.

Discosure: We were invited to review the Village Urban Resort Hotel Farnborough and our stay was complimentary.

Thanks to the manager Mark McMahon and his staff for making us so welcome. 

Blue Monday - yet another remix

On Facebook today I saw someone refer to Blue Monday. It was the first day back at work for many and our boy was back at nursery, so it was business as usual for me too. I was keen to share (well plagiarise actually) a post I've previously written about the phenomenon of blue Monday as it winds me up so much. The actual 'blue Monday' is known as the most depressing day of the year, you know the one:

• the day people give up their New Year's resolutions - especially the not drinking one ! 
• the day gyms see a drop off in new members who've paid up front for the year 
• the day we give up the diet as it's just too difficult and we want to curl up with a cuppa and some biscuits to keep warm
• the day we realise that being paid early for Christmas wasn't so great now we still have ages before the next payday

It's the day that we supposedly feel that sinking post Christmas dread and fall off the wagon of resolutions rashly made in December. So if you feel a bit crappy or were unexpectedly down in the mouth on Monday that's probably why.

Only it's not really. Blue Monday was a PR creation years ago to sell holidays to people in their January gloom. You know how Christmas adverts start in November and then the commercials to entice you to the sales are on just before Christmas then traditionally on Boxing Day we see beautiful beaches, elegant cruises and glamorous aircrews ? Well this whole 'Blue Monday' myth (complete with the 'scientific study' claim that has no basis in reality) is a deliberate effort to get you to book your holidays.

It isn't real people so don't buy into it.

My Monday was pretty good actually - maybe because I wasn't going back to work. Ok, there's no maybe about it, that definitely makes a difference. It was also our boy's first day back at nursery. He's been going stir crazy at home and asking every day if he is going to nursery. When he asked this morning and I replied, "yes sweetie you are," he actually cheered. This on the back of only a few hours sleep between us as he had a horrific nose bleed last night. I went for a relaxing swim at lunchtime and then when I went to Waitrose they had an offer on the wholefood bars I love so much. All in all not too shoddy for me actually - sorry to disappoint.

So, I say let's reclaim the day. Let's make it about something else. So if you've been feeling a bit down about going back to post-Christmas normality this week here are some suggestions of things to shake off the blues:

• change your resolutions to doable ones - instead of I'll lose all the weight and get into a size ten, how about I'll wear clothes that make me look and feel great anyway
• take up something new - not a life changing thing necessarily, maybe start small eg. go for a walk somewhere new or try a different thing for lunch 
• let go of our wishing away last year and embrace this one instead - it's only January, don't be so hard on yourself 
• put all the festive paraphernalia away - accept that all the leftover Christmas food has to go, yes even the peanuts, pretzels, etc.
• make some fun plans for things you can look forward to doing - next week, next month and later in the year. 

Oh and pop on New Order's Blue Monday (the 12") just to remind yourself that it's a song and not a marketing agency's ploy to part you from your holiday fund.

Here's to a Happy Monday (maracas optional)

It's like invasion of the body snatchers

About a month ago I decided to get my hair cut shorter. It's been quite long since before I had my boy and I fancied a change so I had more than half of it chopped off. I love it, it's much handier to style and I've now got the hang of using far less shampoo and conditioner so I'm not left rinsing it out for hours. The strange thing was that only two people noticed and commented. It made me paranoid as I was convinced that meant that it looked terrible.

I don't mean I was fishing for compliments. I mean I was surprised that no one seemed to notice. If someone has changed their hair I will mention it, but I might say, "you've had your hair cut shorter, it suits you" rather than, "your hair looks lovely" if it doesn't - after all if you think someone looks rotten you won't say so will you ?

At university I had quite bad acne that I was sure people stared at. I was convinced that if someone was looking at me it was that they were staring at my blemishes. If you ask anyone I knew then if they recall my appearance they normally mention my very long hair and obsession with shoes rather than my (mostly imagined) hideousness. I've realised that a lot of people don't notice at all - they just don't look at faces or features. I notice things about people. I look at their appearance when I talk to them, but you have to choose when to tell someone they look tired - it's just not polite, so I'd err on the side of never.

I rarely look in mirrors these days so I have no idea what I look like. I manage to go whole days without looking at myself and use either the small mirror in the back of the sun visor of the car or a handheld mirror that is smaller than my lipstick to apply eyeliner and lippy. It isn't because I don't care, I just don't prioritise myself any more. I also have quite a low opinion of my appearance so I'd rather not have it confirmed by looking.

Once upon a time I used to go to the gym every day - sometimes twice a day. Admittedly I was single then and could only access the internet at the gym so I spent hours there and would go to kill time and being able to swim and exercise was a bonus. I was a lot fitter and took part in charity runs, did the Moonwalk one year and could walk up stairs without groaning about my knees. I trained to teach yoga and all the others on my course were slimmer and fitter than me so I dieted and lost weight and was the slimmest I've been as an adult.

Then I fell pregnant and my body changed. That was fine and I was delighted with my growing body as I was pretty sure I had the capacity to get my shape back, maybe not at my thinnest, but certainly slimmer than I am now. I tried everything that I was told, breastfeeding didn't make me slim, walking everywhere with my boy in a pram helped, but it didn't make me thin. And now my boy is three years old and I'm still avoiding mirrors as I don't want to see what I already know. That I am still not a 'yummy Mummy' and while others snap back into shape after making many babies I'm morphing into my aunties after having just the one.

My sister cursed me when I was pregnant by saying that I'd get fat and not be able to lose the weight - I laughed it off as I was sure she was wrong - she was right. All the women in my family are big and I spent my youth trying to keep fit to avoid the inevitable. Now I have creaky knees, a persistent shoulder injury and while I still exercise every day it's through gritted teeth. I do 100 stomach crunches every morning (VB does many more than that), but I'm not about to show off a washboard stomach any time soon.

Victoria Wood made a joke years ago about walking into the Body Shop and saying, "I'd like mine in a size ten please." I hear that.

Does anyone know where my body has gone and how I can get it back please ?  Mine appears to have been snatched !