A feminist, an adopter, a radio presenter, an equality advisor and mum to boys.
I swim, play music, write stuff and have ambitions to declutter my home.
I've been trying to contain my excitement about this news, but I have been bursting to tell everyone. In fact I've already told all the staff in my local Waitrose, Yasmin who does my nails, most of the people I have met in passing since we planned it and now I'm finally telling you too. You see it's something I've wanted to do for so long, but it just hasn't happened. Now, with help from the fantastic folks at Mark Warner we are able to fulfil my wish to do something really special with the boys.
Ok, I'm ridiculously excited about this and really, really want to tell the children. However, it's Blue Bear's birthday in two weeks and with it being so close to Christmas I want to make sure that it is really special for him. Once he has been the centre of attention in his own right we can do the big reveal and share all the amazing new things we are going to try.
Going on a plane: Brown Bear has flown before, but Blue Bear hasn't. I showed the boys their passports the other day and we talked about keeping them safe and what they are for. I asked Blue if he would like to go on a plane and of course he said yes. Phew ! That's a relief.
Staying in a chalet hotel: All our holidays with the boys have been in the UK - well Cornwall because we love it so much. We usually stay in a self-catering cottage and have days out and do activities as a family. This time we have booked to stay in a chalet hotel so we can relax. I don't have to cook and we will have afternoon tea with delicious cakes every day. Now that is dangerous !
Kids' clubs: The biggest departure for us, however, is that we have booked the boys into the Mark Warner kids club which is renowned for being excellent. Brown Bear will go to ski school in the morning and Blue Bear will go to a creche. They are confident and friendly children and will be cared for by British qualified child care staff - we are reassured that they will make friends and have fun.
Doing our own thing: Hubbie doesn't ski and has no interest in learning so I'm planning to head out to the slopes while he relaxes in the chalethotel. There is a heated pool, sauna and steam room and we have a balcony so he can just sit and read if he wants to. I haven't skiied for years so I'm going to tag along to ski school with Brown Bear and hopefully remember what to do. I think staying upright will be my main challenge to start with !
The last time I went skiing I looked like this
Buying ski stuff: Of course this has meant I've had to do some shopping for all the kit we need. It's a difficult job, but someone's got to do it. Family and friends have been advised that the boys have lots of lovely things so for Christmas they don't need any presents. However, some have kindly offered to get them socks, gloves and other things they can use on holiday. I can't wait to see what the boys make of that !
Do me a favour: So, now I've told you there is something I need you to do. You have to keep it to yourself. It it still a secret from the boys so please don't tell them. I promise I will share the big reveal when we do finally tell them. I think Brown Bear already suspects something as he said the other day, "I've never been skiing. I'd love to go." I smiled and said, "I'm sure you will get to one day."
You will definitely be fed up of hearing about it, but for now I'm just so excited !
Disclosure: We have collaborated with the lovely folks at Mark Warner to make this trip possible.
Oh wow where do we start when it comes to holidays ? Since Blue Bear joined our family 2 years ago - I know has it been that long already ? - we've loved going on holiday together. We couldn't apply for a passport for him until he was officially adopted so it wasn't until the end of last year that he finally got one. I can't wait for a chance to use it !
So before we had kids we loved going on holiday and would go away about 3-4 times a year. We would have a big holiday (eg. Kerala), then a few short breaks and usually a spontaneous one where I would treat Hubbie or he'd treat me. That's how we went to Morrocco for his birthday the year before we had Brown Bear. We took Brown Bear on holiday a few years ago and he was so well behaved on the plane that an older couple sitting opposite the aisle from us commented that they hadn't even known a child was on the plane. I think that's a compliment. We have taken UK holidays more recently with the boys and it's given us a great idea of what matters to us. It's by no means an exhaustive list, but here - in no order - are our top ten holiday essentials.
Adventure: My boys love to try new things and as Blue Bear has suddenly become a real daredevil a holiday is a great way to channel this. Last year Brown Bear and I tried surfing for the first time and the year before we went skydiving together - on a cruise ship. We're certainly not short of bravery ! A holiday is the perfect opportunity to have a go and often the boys will make friends with other children who inspire them to step outside their comfort zone. Admittedly, so far that has meant feeding rabbits or chasing a goose with a big net, but it's all good practice. Eventually I'm sure they will graduate to some impressive feats in exotic locations. Ok so I'm sure you can do a bungee jump in a car park in Croydon, but I'm not about to. No, sorry I'm just not.
Daredevil Blue Bear
Don't try this at home: Being on holiday is a great chance to do things you don't get to do at home. That might be to eat food we don't usually eat - Blue Bear graduated from only eating the cones to the whole ice cream last summer. Maybe it's the change of scene that makes it more appealing to do things we don't usually do, or possibly it's the 'relaxation' that comes from being on holiday. Yeah, I know that hardly sounds like a typical family holiday, but just being away from the daily routine can be relaxing. That alone can inspire the interest in having a go at something I wouldn't normally try at home. It was while we were in Rome that Hubbie reminded me that on holiday I could just stay in bed all day if I wanted to. Oh the chance would be a fine thing.
Pancake tossing for the first time
Delicious food: When we're in Cornwall I make a beeline for a cream tea and Hubbie mainlines pasties for a week. The boys love ice cream of all types and we let them have it pretty much every day because, well we are on holiday after all. Eating is one of the highlights of a great holiday for me.
Mouthwatering
Time for Mummy and Daddy: We don't always get to spend time together any more so having time to go out for a meal or to hang out together on holiday is just precious to us. Holidays change when you have children. Rather than lying in we're up at early o'clock and instead of strolling through market towns and hanging out drinking and eating we have to find things that entertain kids. So the next essential makes this one possible for us...
Time off from being Daddy and Mummy
Aah, holiday fun
Kids' Clubs: At first we weren't so sure about leaving our boy with people we didn't know. Then we realised that he prefered to spend time with other children and that it meant we could have a break and just lie by the pool, or take a fitness class, or (now don't tell anyone) just lie in bed. The staff are trained, CRB checked and often much more fun than we could ever hope to be. I don't blame the boys for wanting to go !
Busy Brown and Blue Bears
Travel broadens the mind: We always hire a car when we go abroad so that we can manage transfers ourselves and take day trips or just pop out to the shops under our own steam. We took a road trip from San Francisco to Las Vegas years ago and when the boys are older I'd love to do something like that with them. Not least as I think they'd enjoy the soundtracks we pick while we do long drives - nope second thought they'd hate the music, but still it would be funny to hear them complain about our uncool taste.
Beep beep, make way
Being in nature: Whether it's sunny or snowy being outside and exploring our surroundings is a huge part of a holiday for us. I want to take the boys skiing because while I'm not the best skiier it is such great fun. We're also keen to take them to India to meet family, but also to see a completely different landscape from the one they are used to. South London and Kerala have very little in common !
It's only natural
Neo: When we go away it's really important to us that Neo is being cared for and we enjoy our holidays knowing he's happy and being visited by a wonderful catsitter called Lauren who comes in, feeds him and plays with him. I think he actually likes it more than he lets on really as she does spoil him a bit.
We love Neo
Flying on a plane !! What child doesn't love the excitement of air travel ? From dragging a trunki through the airport to the fun games and snacks that we pack to keep them entertained it's all so much fun. I took Blue Bear to Croydon Airport to take a look up close at this plane in preparation for his first holiday. Brown Bear was lucky enough to get to meet the pilot when we took him on holiday and hopefully Blue will get to do the same.
Wow is it a real plane Mummy ?
Brotherly love: My boys have been brothers for two years now and we've come such a long way in that time. From being two only children who didn't want to share parents, grandparents, aunties, uncles, toys or a cat they are now loyal and devoted to each other. Holidays are a chance to bond and often the people we meet have no idea that we have an adopted and a birth child. On holiday they are just brothers. They bicker, they play, they laugh, they wake up ridiculously early and they gang up on us. It's everything we wished for when we longed to be parents.
My gorgeous boys
There is so much more I'd love to tell you about; How I take teabags with me because I love tea. The meticulous timing of car journeys so that we can make stops for lunch in strategic places. How I make sure I've packed lots of crayons, new magazines and plenty of sweets to make the travelling a bit more bearable.
For now, though, I'll just say that we'd love to be Mark Warner ambassadors. Fingers crossed...
It feels like they kids have been off school for ages. I've been through pretty much every emotion going and at times I've felt overwhelmed by the prospect of even more days with them at home. However, there are some things I've learned which have helped me with this second year of entertaining two boys. Early morning TV for the boys: Brown Bear wakes up early whatever the time of year - he always has. I have to stop him from going into Blue Bear's room and waking him up because my youngest is not a morning person. In fact if it was possible I can imagine Blue Bear would be mainlining black coffee first thing to truly wake up. So in the absence of an acceptable alternative to caffeine for children I have to do whatever it takes. Some days that means Henry Danger from morning to night and others it's Paw Patrol back to back. I swear if I hear that theme tune one more time I'm going to turn into a pup myself.
The boys chillaxing on the sofa
Naps during the day: My kids just don't sleep during the day any more, but holidays mean I run them ragged all morning then pop some soothing music on and get them to lie down so mama can watch Breaking Bad and forget about the washing up. It makes all the difference to what greets Hubbie when he gets home, is it the serene earth mother with her beloved boys cradled in her arms on the sofa or the screeching harpie who heads straight out of the door as soon as his foot steps over the threshold to prevent some domestic disaster from occuring ? That little bit of down time is my saving grace - honest !
Shopping for food: like every day. How is it possible for kids to eat so damn much ? I know that a lot of parents struggle to fund the holidays and swear that a lot of that is the extra meals when the kids aren't eating at school every day. How do they cope at school having to go for over an hour without having a snack or a meal of some kind ? It seems to be impossible at home to go for any length of time without a demand for a drink, a snack, apple fingers, a treat or 'those biscuits I saw in the shopping bag.' Hubbie asks me why I have been shopping again and I raise an eyebrow and consider letting all the food run out and leaving home for a few days to see if he can deal with the armageddon that will ensue.
Shopping cart helper
Impulse purchases. Like going in to buy a bunch of bananas and coming home with folding camping chairs for the kids. I feel you judging me and no I just don't care. We don't take the boys away on holidays abroad so my way of making it up to them is to treat them to fun things to do at home. The tally so far this summer includes; bikes for both boys (second hand) a play circus tent for indoors, the aforementioned chairs, a new paddling pool and a ridiculous amount of clothes. I did also manage to sneak in these beauties. I know, I know, hardly de rigeur on the school run, but what is life without a little luxury ? Besides a happy mummy makes for a less stressful house and looking at these shoes makes me happy. Imagine how joyful I'd be if I got to actually wear them !
My gorgeous gold sandals
Crumbs everywhere: Seriously. I must vacuum more than anyone I know. I have an aversion to wearing shoes indoors and walking on debris from their constant munching makes me cringe. It's not exactly obsessive compulsive, more a pernickity habit which isn't helped by having a cat that sheds all over the house. At least his fur is a similar colour to the carpets. Talking of which he seems to trot in half the garden too so as well as the carpets resembling the coating of a fishfinger I have to contend with random leaves and soil paw prints.
Play dates: this is the first year we've really embraced play dates. In previous years I've sent email to the school mums to suggest days out ideas. Some of them have met up with me and the boys and it's been a nice way to break up the long holiday and stop Brown Bear from missing his school mates. This year the others have also taken the initiative to suggest things and invite us to join them. It's been a real lifesaver for me (and the boys if I'm honest !) We've been to the lavender fields, had a fun afternoon with other friends and only today the boys had a great double play date and I even managed to talk to the other mum a little bit !
A traffic jam during our play date
Movies: There are always lots of movies. Brown Bear loves watching them and we jump at the chance to go to the cinema. Last week we went to watch Blinky Bill the movie. It's about a well loved character who has been a celebrity in Australia for a century, but isn't so well known here. We watched it at the new screening room inside Soho House - now there's posh ! - and loved it. I admit it's not a movie that I knew much about before we went, but I'd recommend it if you're looking for a fun and family friendly movie. Blinky is a young koala who leaves his home in Greenpatch to search for his father who left a year ago on an adventure and didn't return. On his travels he meets Nutsy - a zoo koala - and various animals who help him and using his ingenuity he proves how brave he is. The adults in the cinema were rolling around laughing at the Aussie jokes - I suspect one of them was Antipodean himself. It was fun trying to spot the voices of well know Aussies including Barry Humphries - well, you really can't miss him - and Toni Colette. The movie opens nationwide this weekend.
Blinky and Nutsy in Blinky Bill the movie
I think I'm just getting into the swing of the holidays this year. Maybe by next time I'll even enjoy myself ? Let's not be silly though eh ?
Before the school holidays I like to plan ahead and have some idea of what to do with the boys to keep them busy. I have to have something in mind otherwise I can get into a panic about how to keep them from being bored and running riot around the house. It appears I'm not alone in my worries and in research carried out by Fellowes* they found out what stresses parents the most about school holidays.
Unsurprisingly top of the list of worries is the cost of keeping children entertained during the long break. That and how to manage disruption to daily routines - are concerns I can identify with. I have a few rules about how to manage including getting the boys to decide if they want a lazy day or an active one. As it's been so hot this week we've had relatively low key days so far. I took them swimming this morning to cool them off before the heatwave set in. Yesterday we did one of my favourite low cost art activities:
The Big Picture
You know when you receive a package and it's filled with packaging material ? Well I unroll it to see if it's worth keeping and if it is brown paper I keep it in a box for rainy days and indoor fun. I lay it on the floor - or in this case on a long table - and put crayons, coloured pencils and pens in the middle. The boys have plenty of space to draw and/or write and it keeps them quiet for, oh minutes. Big pictures don't have to be kept, they are just fun to do.
One of the other worries in the survey was keeping the house clean and tidy during the holidays. As someone who is constantly trying to declutter and tidy my home I struggle with this one too. I try to be a bit laissez faire with the house during the summer, but I do expect a level of respectable tidyness. The playroom is going to get trashed - I accept that. I do have some chores that I like to get done and the boys have jobs to do too.
Printable planning sheets
These printables from Fellowes enable me to plan ahead with the boys and when I laminate them they are wipe clean and reusable too. If possible I can also try and build in some time for myself so that it isn't all too much. Managing time and workload can be tricky during the holidays, but it's important to make child free time to keep me sane.
At Britmums Live a few weeks ago I was chatting to the lovely folks on the Fellowes stand when I admired the laminator they were demonstrating to show off the free printables they have online. I am looking forward to having a play with mine and using it to prepare these wipe clean printables for the boys to write / draw about days out during the holidays. We're also going to laminate some special pictures and certificates from school. The world is our laminating oyster !
I know the key for me is planning ahead and doing all I can to ensure that the boys are kept busy and occupied. I'll let you know how I get on !
For now take a look at the top ten things that parents stress about and hopefully feel better about yourself :)
Summer Stresses
Having the money to entertain the family
Keeping a child/children entertained
Juggling work with childcare
Keeping the house clean and tidy
Being able to get time of work when wanted/needed
Disruption to daily routine
Maintaining a good work/life balance
Finding time for yourself
Managing hay fever/allergies
Travelling with the family
*Fellowes surveyed 1003 respondents with children aged 4-8 years.
Disclosure: This is a collaborative post with Fellowes.
We've just spent a week on holiday with the boys in gorgeous Cornwall. We spent days out and about and even had some lovely weather to enjoy the beach. Hubbie and I are zonked out and in need of a period of recovery and - if I'm honest - some child free time. Except now I'm home with them for 2 months. Yeah 2 whole months with them at home with me and no respite. The exhaustion of being with two belligerant and argumentative boys hasn't quite worn off yet so I won't bore you with details. Instead I'll give you a whistle stop tour of the holiday snaps. Enjoy :)
It was Blue Bear's first visit to Peppa Pig World - he loved it !
Camper Van fun to start the holiday
We always visit Lappa Valley - it's a brilliant day out for the boys (and Hubbie loves it too)
Ruby the steam engine
The boys wanted to play crazy golf with Daddy - with varying degrees of success
Blue Bear putting
Brown Bear playing seriously
On a particularly sunny afternoon we decided to go to the beach - great fun
Beach Boys
Me and Brown Bear tried out surfing for the first time - it was awesome !
Polzeath Beach
Jiggles the Bear and Woof Woof the Dog enjoyed relaxing at the beachside cafe during lunch
Jiggles and Woof Woof chilling out
Pizza after surfing was fabulous !!
Veggie and delicious !
Brown Bear went for a lovely walk with Stanley the dog - it was so sweet
Stanley and Brown Bear taking the coastal road to Tintagel
The search for the camper van is now on - we found a few to be going on with
One of our favourite places to visit when we stay in Cornwall is the Eden Project. Well I say 'we' when I mean me really. The boys tolerate a is it because I make sure they have plenty to do when we are there. There are proper Cornish pastys for Hubbie, local ice cream for Big Boy and Baby Boy just goes wild for all the dogs that he sees all over Cornwall, but especially at Eden.
I first visited when the Eden Project opened and it was a much smaller attraction back then. It was mostly a quarry with a car park and the biomes were new and the main reason for visiting. Since then the site has been developed further and you now have plenty to see and do on a day there. We've been 4 times in the last two years and still haven't done everything.
When we visited earlier this week we knew we'd have a large part of the day, but wanted to make the most of our visit. When we arrived we all decided to walk down - you can also take the land train which is great fun and goes every 20 minutes taking around 15 minutes to go from the top to the bottom and vice versa. Me and Big Boy decided to walk down the playful steps which are great fun and a lot faster then at the path that we usually take.
One of the things that makes repeat visits so much fun is that the activities at the Eden Project are seasonal. When we visited last Christmas we went to see Father Christmas and had an ice skate - more of which later. For half term there are special events for 'Halloweden' including a 'wishcraft' area.
Something else that is lovely to see is the changing colours of the seasons. This is more evident in the Mediterranean biome which has a temperate climate and varying displays. It's also where they stroytime is held and we've taken the boys to see this a few times. They really enjoy the craft activities and stories and singing. You can check the times for these on arrival so you an plan your day in advance. On the day we went there was also a tea tasting of Pukka Teas - they're wonderful and hearing about the origins of the ingredients was really interesting too.
Inside the Mediterranean biome there is room to roam and my boys like to explore. It's colourful and spacious and you will often see school parties taking part in challenges that encourage them to visit all the different zones. Last time we visited I took Baby Boy to the Rainforest Biome with me, but this time I asked Big Boy if he wanted to come with me. We left Baby Boy with Daddy to listen to stories and went for a wander.
In the past we have had to cut short visits to the Rainforest Biome as it does get very humid and on a hot day this can be very difficult to deal with. When Big Boy was younger he really didn't like it at all. This time we took our time and it wasn't too crowded so we were able to take it at our own pace. I showed Big Boy the waterfall that provides a dramatic centrepiece for the biome and showed him the highest point you can stand to view the whole thing. We've made a deal that when he's older we will climb all the way to the top.
I'm very proud of my boys for taking an interest in something that I love so much. As a reward we had planned something very special for Big Boy to do with me at the end. Because he enjoyed the ice skating so much at Christmas we booked to go again this time. The rink is open now and there are sessions every day with sessions for toddlers, lessons and half price times. We booked a penguin aid for Big Boy to help him skate and he did amazingly well. By the end we were gracefully gliding across the ice - sort of. Baby Boy and Hubbie watched from the side and popped outside for a stroll when they got bored. While we were skating a wheelchair user also joined us on the ice and she was having a whale of a time. It was fantastic to have the room to enjoy the rink on a not so busy day.
We were lucky to be able to visit on a day outside half term and I imagine it will be much busier next week, but even when we've been during the summer months it's always a great day out. We have lovely food, walk lots and spend time together doing fun things.
You can book tickets online for the Eden Project and get a green travel discount if you walk, cycle or take public transport.
You can gift aid a ticket so it's valid for a year and you can visit as many times as you like - it's worth it ! You can also book Ice Skating online.
Disclosure: The lovely folks at the Eden Project gave us complimentary entry and ice skating.
Keeping the kids occupied during half term inevitably involves a fair amount of travelling around for us. As we're well versed in long journeys I like to prepare with plenty to keep the boys busy including snacks and games. Big Boy watches movies or plays games on a small handheld console and we have found this seat back organiser is perfect for holding spare games, small toys and even a drink or snack bag. He is old enough now to manage his own entertainment so we let him play with what he chooses and if he wants to take a nap he switches off the games or movie and has a sleep.
Baby Boy enjoys looking out of the window and spotting animals or other exciting scenery. His particular favourite on the drive down to Cornwall is spotting the wind fans that we see dotted around the landscape. I've shown him a hand sign to help identify them without the high pitched squeal of delight that he currently emits which is pretty off-putting when you're driving. The other device that we've found really helpful is this seat back mirror and music player which plays soothing tunes or nursery rhymes. When we're on a long drive he likes to listen to the music and at night time the twinkling lights help settle him down. It's easily attached the the headrest of the seat in front and you have a small remote to control it from the front of the car as well.
Most importantly when we're travelling we have to have snacks and drinks to hand for the boys - including Hubbie ! I found that these snack pods were just brilliant to help manage days out on holiday too. I pop small snacks in the blue pot which has an opening that stops everything falling onto the floor and the other side has a cup holder which I put a sippy cup in for Baby Boy and a non spill cup for Big Boy. The adjustable holder can attach to the side of a car seat, but I found it worked really well attached to the inside of the door where they could reach their own drinks and snacks without spillage.
I know when I was a kid long journeys there weren't so many gadgets to keep us occupied. We would play games or look for animals out of the windows. I do this with my boys too, but I'm not a luddite. To be honest when it comes to travelling with small children anything that makes the journey easier for all of us is going to appeal. These travel helpers from Munchkin have been great for us and I can see they will get a lot more use during half term too.
Disclosure: We were sent these travel items for an honest review by the lovely people at Munchkin.
