It's my birthday !!!

My boy made me a special picture

I apologise for not writing a 'proper' post today, but it's my birthday you see. Of course I realise it's completely undignified to make a big deal about it at my age - don't be cheeky, I'm not telling you. Me and Hubbie rarely get time, just the two of us, so today he took the day off. This being real life he had to go into work this evening, but we still got to spend the day doing things we like.

 A lovely surprise delivery today :)

So firstly we packed the boy off to nursery. He loves it when Hubbie is around for the nursery run, dontcha just love being the 'invisible,' less popular parent ? Then we went for a swim together. Usually one of us is keeping the boy occupied in the kiddie pool, but today we swam side by side. I'm a fairly solitary swimmer so it was a moot point, but still nice.

Then - after a bit of social media surfing (obvs) - I put on a nice dress, make-up and even heels (Hubbie nearly fainted with shock) and we went out for a nice lunch. I had a glass of wine and we chatted while the rain pattered on the windows and the staff effortlessly glided around us delivering delicious food. It was blissful :)

For me ? Oh you shouldn't have :) 

It's back to business as usual tomorrow. I'll do the nursery run and it'll be leftovers for lunch.

Just for today though, it's all about me :) 

My Secret Seven: Fun free stuff to do with a threenager

It's another bank holiday weekend and if - like me - you dread having to occupy a toddler who would otherwise be going to nursery on a Monday then fear not, I may have some life-saving tips for you. Over time I have collected some ideas that I've found keep my boy happy - at least momentarily. He drives me up the wall with constant demands to do things and for me to participate, so I've had to devise a roster of things we can do that don't cost much and that are simple to do. Not least as the last bank holiday I had a tummy bug so I wasn't able to do much with him and Hubbie had to keep him occupied while I snoozed under a blanket on the sofa with the cat occasionally checking up on me.

So, in no particular order, here are some things that I find work to keep my boy happy and that are virtually free:

• A Cocochino / Babychino at Wagamama / Pizza Express:  of course you may well have to pay out for a meal too, but honestly the delight our boy felt at his first frothy milk with a smattering of chocolate on top was worth the price of a bowl of noodles. 

It is in a espresso cup, but they assure me it's just milk

• Wave at train drivers and tram drivers: My boy loves all public transport and we regularly get a beep beep from them as our boy enthusiastically waves from the train or tram platform - a safe distance from the edge of course. I like to think it makes the driver's day to know someone is pleased to see them and it delights my boy when they wave back. He's also got a friendship with the bin men as he loves the truck and they know him now so they wave back and beep to say hello. It makes his Tuesday morning. 

• A walk in the woods: We're lucky we live very close to some woods so wellies on and we're off. If it's dry we take a bag for collecting 'treasure' and see how many different (small) things we can find to put in the bag. Acorns, leaves, a stick or an unusual stone all make for a fun tableau when we get home. If it's a wet day we're less inclined to pick stuff up off the floor, but still enjoy the muddy walking. 

• Parks and playgrounds: Not my strong point I'm afraid. I have a very low boredom threshold so  while the boy wants to keep going on the slide and swings I look like a sullen teenager bunking off school so Hubbie does this one. Our boy loves to scooter there so it's double bubble in tiring him out and ensures a good night's sleep. 

Adventure playgrounds with a pub attached are perfect :)

• 'Helping' with the shopping: Now you probably have to go shopping at some point even if it's just for a pint of milk because you've made your first tea of the day and there are bits floating on top (yep that was me yesterday). Give your threenager a pen and some paper and let them make a list too, if you use your own bags they can help get shopping bags ready too. Our boy doesn't sit in the trolley any more so he helps pick things from the shelves instead. Fresh fruit and vegetables are a great one especially if you have a local market where they can see lots of foods laid out beautifully instead of in plastic packaging. We let our boy choose one thing as a thank you for helping. Hubbie gets him a toy car, but if he goes with me I get him fruit. I know I'm not the fun one am I ? 

• Family history: Go through some old baby photos and talk about what it was like when he was a baby. He really loves this and when we show him photos of us as babies too he is really captivated by them. It's such an easy thing to do and the whole family can join in as grandparents and aunties often have their own stash of photos and memories to share as well. A video of our boy as a baby babbling and being fascinated by his own hand has been a huge favourite this week and he's shown it to everyone who's visited us. 

• Free museums: Ok admittedly these are London-centric, but the Science and Natural History Museums are my son's favourite. Mine is the V&A, but it's not his cup of tea, sadly. This one does involve travel costs, but our boy does love trains, buses and trams so that's all part of the adventure.  Once there my boy can spend hours wandering round the various exhibits and it's so much fun that he is exhausted by the time we are travelling home. 

The Museum of Childhood 

Do you have any fun and free ideas to keep kids busy ?

We were going out to dinner...

...so I was choosing some earrings to wear that would look pretty, but not get stuck in my hair or fall out of my ears (this happens frequently). We'd arranged to meet at the restaurant - well calling it a restaurant is a bit much as the service is pretty lax and the food variable at best, but it's local and serves the kind of italian food you know you'll enjoy anyway.

The first time we'd eaten there I'd asked for the gnocchi and they said it wasn't available that evening. A few days later Hubbie (then boyfriend) was making me some dinner at his flat. He made gnocchi because, "I wanted to make you happy." It was a pretty foregone conclusion that we'd be married after that. We still went to the restaurant every week despite them forgetting our starters, regularly having only two thirds of the menu available and occasionally just not remembering we were even there. It's safe to say it wasn't the busiest place in Battersea.

After only a year of being married we were still holding on to the romantic rituals and habits that we had started when we were first courting. The regular meals out, the walks along the river on a Sunday, city breaks and holidays during school term time. Ah the bliss of the childless. Not that we didn't want children of course, we just hadn't had them yet and it was only a matter of time.

We had been trying since before the wedding and while we hadn't expected to get the jackpot honeymoon baby we were just wondering if there was something going on that we should know about. In fact we both went to see our respective GPs to check that all was ok with us and had various blood tests, which for a man who hates the sight of blood was a bit of a trial really. Hubbie was going to see his doctor after work for his results then coming to join me for dinner.

I put on lip gloss and mascara and checked my reflection for any smudges. A whole day at work can do weird things to a face and no amount of candlelight can disguise it, so I was relying on the magical power of make-up to give the illusion of natural beauty. I heard the double beep of a text message coming through. As I picked up my coat and went to the door I glanced at the screen. "I'm finished here. See you in ten xx"

As I walked I saw the evening runners in Battersea Park wearing reflective gear, bobbing along like fireflies. It was one of my favourite places to run too and I loved living so close that I could go there before work. I had encouraged Hubbie to run with me and he'd become quite a keen runner himself. He was even training for the Windsor half marathon.

By the time I got the restaurant he was already standing outside and he smiled as he caught sight of me. He held the door open for me and I joked that I hoped he'd had a snack on the way just in case. We sat at a table by the window - a mistake, they never see you sitting there, but you can watch everyone else walk past. I asked if he'd had a nice day and he smiled again. The waitress came over and took our drinks orders. My coat fell off the back of my chair so I went to retrieve it from the floor and realised I hadn't asked and he hadn't told me. "What did the doctor say ?" "Oh not a lot really." "Ok, good or bad news then ?" I laughed a little, he didn't. "He says it's highly unlikely we can have children." The waitress came back with our drinks. She asked if we were ready to order yet. We both shook our heads.

Now I looked a little closer I could see behind his glasses that his eyes were red. He still had his coat on and he hadn't looked at me since we sat down in the restaurant. I reached out to put my hand over his on the table. After some time he said, "What do you want to do ?" After a bit more time I said, "Well I'm going to order the gnocchi." We both smiled, he took off his coat and we raised our glasses to each other.

This post is my entry for the Mumsnet Blogfest competition using Lionel Shriver's favourite first line from a book. 
Fingers crossed :o)