Zestica fertility kit

If you're a regular reader you will know a little about the journey we had to take in order to meet our beloved boy. You may also have realised we've been trying for another for a while. I won't dwell on the details as friends & family reading this really won't want to know, but it's safe to share that seeing a lot of others who've gone on to have a second ( or more) has not been easy. I smile and congratulate them as it's churlish not to and they're probably not that keen to hear how we were so close and it didn't work out. No one wants to be a downer do they ?

Another kindly blogger who's had similar experiences and is now pregnant with her second (and I'm genuinely very happy for her) put me in contact with Zestica as they have launched a kit to assist couples who are struggling to conceive. The kit comes with two different gels in individual tubes and a set of ovulation tests. There is a calendar provided to help you work out when to use which product. 

The conception gels are used daily in the days leading up to ovulation and are designed to prepare you (the woman) to conceive. The ovulation kits help pin point when you ovulate so you can try on the most likely days. The fertility gels are to use on those days. Not to be too indelicate, but they're also for the woman and are supposed to help assist 'his' swimmers to Olympic standards. 

The timings are a little difficult to get the hang of at first, but the instructions do help. There is a reference to an online calendar which I was unable to find so I relied on charting the days on paper. There is, however, an issue with the lack of spontaneity in having to pop in a gel before you can have some 'grown up time.' 

I did not fall pregnant after using this kit, but I know that despite the stories you hear about things working first time they rarely do if you're already struggling to conceive. I was prepared to try shamanic healing, acupuncture and all manner of bizarre weirdness before we had our boy, so this is quite scientific in comparison. 

It's not entirely clear what the science behind it is, but I'm guessing that most people using it won't ask too many questions if it works for them. It's priced at £39.99 which isn't the priciest kit I've seen so it's reasonable value. You get enough gels & tests for one cycle so if you're having to try again a few times the costs could be quite substantial. 

If you're trying for a baby it is probably worth giving this kit a go. You will get a good idea how your cycle works (if you don't know already) and it's not that much of a hassle to use - aside from the spontaneity issue mentioned earlier of course.

You can purchase the kit from www.zestica.com and good luck !

Disclosure: I was sent this kit in order to write an honest review. No payment was received for this post. 

"I'd give anything to have biscuit crumbs trodden into the carpet."

I was driving back from a yoga training day today and listening to Radio 4. It was a repeat of Woman's Hour with Jane Garvey and I heard an interview with Jody Day for the second time this week about her experience of being a childless woman. It moved me when I heard it the first time, but I was doing chores that time and today I was properly listening. It was a breathtakingly honest account of discovering one day that having children just isn't going to happen. In addition to dealing with the grief at this realisation there is the loneliness as friends with children slowly let you go as they carry on with their lives as a family.

The interview hit a chord with me for two reasons. At one point we were told we wouldn't have children and it reminded me how it felt when that was the realistic future that me and Hubbie had to come to terms with. One day I was sitting reading a magazine at the hairdressers and I phoned Hubbie from under the dryer to ask if he'd agree to adopting one of the millions of abandoned girl children from India. Another time I called him to say that I'd heard about some healing technique that had amazing results and we just had to try it. We were asked constantly when we were going to have children and some family members were less than subtle about it. As well as being asked about it we also had to contend with other people who were having babies. It broke my heart hearing we wouldn't have a baby. It broke Hubbie's heart too and he even suggested I might want to be with someone else who might be a better bet. I nearly hit him for that.

It could have broken us. Thankfully it didn't.

The other reason is because now we do have a son and when I met up with friends recently we were chatting. I mentioned how I missed going out as much as they do and having holidays and other things that we don't do as much any more now we are parents. My friend said she would love to be in my position and have a child and a family life. I was reminded of that today on Radio 4 when a listener said she would give anything to have biscuit crumbs on her carpet rather than a clean and tidy childless home. That made me choke. Not a good thing when you're on the M25.

I know how it feels to long for a child. To try and count the blessings you will have instead of children. The beautiful home free from sticky fingerprints and the expensive holidays instead of day trips to Legoland and Chessington. I also know that I had a career because I didn't have children. I wasn't a 'career woman' out of choice. Hubbie was willing to endure acupuncture in our pursuit of parenthood - he is terrified of needles.

Of course I know that not every woman wants to have children, but I also know that when it is not an option it just feels so very unfair. I also know that being told you're so lucky that you don't get woken up early is not reassuring. That owning a gorgeous handbag that won't have upturned juice cartons and gummy sweets in it is no consolation when you want someone to call you Mummy. I know that having a spontaneous and inventive sex life with your partner doesn't necessarily make up for having a second bedroom that you would have loved to have been a nursery.

Most importantly that interview reminded me today that I should never forget to be a kind and considerate friend.

I remember how it felt to long for what I now have.