Wake me up before you ..... zzzzzzzzzzzz

For those too young to get the reference

Sleep. Who can honestly say they get enough of it ?

I know when I was a callow youth it was a competition to live on the least sleep. This was in the days when the PM apparently ruled on only 4 hours. This explains why she was such a callous dictator. It wasn't actually government policy it was that she'd been sleep deprived for so many years having had twin babies that she never slept a full night again and was permanently cranky. See Meryl Streep didn't pick up on that little character point did she ? Oscar back please. Thank you.

Anyway, I digress, I know shocker. I survived on very little sleep at Uni partly because I didn't want to miss anything. I'd stay until the end of a party or be with the last to leave the bar and work into the small hours then wake up early to go for a swim or to get books to the library. It explains why I regularly nodded off on a Monday morning during Trevor's 4 hour history lecture - to be fair it was about the crusades - I'm yawning thinking about it even now. Since then I can't sit in a lecture or speech without the heavy lidded spectre of narcolepsy hanging over me. Essentially I've survived on little sleep most of my life and taken a perverse pride in the achievement.

Until I had a baby that is.

Now competitive sleeplessness is a thing amongst parents. Not in the same, "Oh man I was so smashed did you see that last encore the Pixies did after midnight ? What, you left ? It was amaaaazing..." etc. way. No. It's the one topic that causes so much consternation in parenting circles as once sane adults try to outdo each other in the, "I haven't slept in .. days... weeks... months" stakes. I just can't partake in that nonsense.

Maybe I was especially good in my last life or something. I didn't have that. Our boy has always been a great little sleeper. He was two weeks over his due date as he wasn't in a rush to be born - chilled out as he was in there. Then as soon as he was born he promptly had a pooh on the midwives and went to sleep. I had to wake him up to feed him and took photos while he was awake.

This is how most people saw our boy

There are friends who never saw him awake for the first 6 months of his life. When I went to visit my lovely NCT teacher Wendy the boy nodded off in the pram on the way to the bus stop and stayed asleep all the way there and while I enjoyed two cups of tea, a homemade cupcake and a sit down. No one knew what colour his eyes were for months and they never heard him cry. Of course as soon as the wheels of his buggy touched the front steps of our house he woke up, but he had a feed and pretty much nodded off again. It was like living with a student.

During the night we co-slept so he took up the entire bed and I didn't really sleep much as we discovered early on that he slept on his front and as we're all told that is a no-no I would lie there listening to him breathe. We worked out he was being a cat and as his head was to the side he was fine. Of course poor Hubbie was back at work two weeks after the boy was born so he was the one who needed sleep. At times I'd send him to the spare room so he'd get some rest before going to work. He didn't want to leave us though.

In fact during the 2010 baseball season I'd breastfeed the baby then Hubbie would take him downstairs to watch the baseball on TV so I could sleep. I told you I must have accumulated some good karma that's been paid back in this life to get so lucky. The boy was clearly also a good luck charm as they watched the SF Giants romp to their first World Series victory in over 50 years.

With the exception of the colic months - that period of time when we took it in turns to rock the baby and soothe him while he screeched in pain - we've had it pretty good really. Which is why I'm a bit surprised at the turn it's taken in recent months where I wake up completely exhausted. Our boy goes to bed at a sensible time and sleeps right through until at least 6am which is later than Hubbie gets up to go to work. I, however, am welded to my pillow feeling like I've got a hangover. This isn't helped by a toddler running in shouting, "Mummy, I want to get dressed. Shall we brush our teeth ?" and so on.

I realise it's hardly the middle of the night or anything, and we're so fortunate to have a child who sleeps as well as he does. I'm just hoping that it's going to rub off on me too. I'd love to wake up with that level of enthusiasm first thing.

For now I'm going to take my cue from the cat and nap during the day to make up for it.

Night night.

Chilling with my cat

And now for something a bit serious

There were two news stories that I took particular interest in this week and I wanted to share some thoughts on them.

The first was a news item about the arrest of nine men from Rochdale and Oldham who had been involved in systematic grooming and sexual abuse of young girls. Comment and opinion has come from quarters as diverse as the BNP and the chair of the Equality and Human Rights Commission. Interestingly enough they seem to be saying about the same thing - that race is a factor as 8 of the men are Pakistani and one is from Afganistan. The assertion has been that they targeted white girls due to cultural attitudes towards sexuality. This completely ignores the fact that abuse is abuse regardless of the ethnicity of the victim or perpetrator. It also turns a blind eye to the abuse that takes place within the Asian community (which is the catch-all term being used to describe these men) and goes unspoken about. Additionally there is the practice of underage marriage which pretty much sanctions child abuse and is more common than we are led to believe. To make this about race is unnecessary as it takes away from the reality that these are horrific and cruel acts committed by nasty people. In communities where it is the custom to call all adults uncle and aunty and to show respect to them a child can be placed in a vulnerable situation and not feel able to report it to anyone. Targeting complete strangers and luring them into a dangerous situation is downright criminal and thankfully these men have been caught and charged. Don't even get me started on how unhelpful Trevor Phillips' comments are - just read them and decide for yourself: http: BBC News website

The other news item playing out towards the end of this week was the cover of Time magazine to illustrate an article about attachment parenting. In case you haven't seen it this is the photo:

The various debates on radio and online have included spokespeople from Mumsnet and other parenting organisations. All of them commenting on the pose of the photograph and not the article itself. What was a piece about attachment parenting has become outrage at a woman defiantly appearing to breastfeed a child who can stand and look at the camera. Not for them the traditional babe in arms pose we are used to seeing (or not as the case may be). The various threads of discussion I've followed have been about whether or not prolonged breastfeeding is about the child or the mother. I breastfed my son and wanted to do so for as long as it suited him. Eventually at 14 months I had to concede that he wasn't really feeding any more and it was about me wanting to hold him close and keep the bond we had developed. When he was first born and we were in hospital for a few days I fed him for hours at a time and holding him close was just the most wonderful sensation. Being able to let go of that closeness is difficult, but I have noticed that as he grows he chooses how to be close to me and this autonomy and independence is important. It has always been important that my son feels close to both me and Hubbie and they also have a very affectionate relationship. Being able to breastfeed is a wonderful way to build a bond with your child and one I'd recommend to anyone. However, it isn't always possible for a mother to breastfeed and it isn't an option for the father so attachment comes in many other forms. The magic 2 year goal for breastfeeding is taken from the World Health Organisation guidance to women in the whole world. It is the safest, most hygienic and cheapest option for mothers of babies born in countries where water is not clean or accessible and where healthcare is not freely available. However, in a culture where we have the choice it is the tyranny of the 'Mummy mafia' that makes breastfeeding for years the gold standard of caring. If I sought validation from the Supermums I'd have serious concerns about my own sanity.

Next time: back to usual light-hearted self deprecating schtick I promise :o)