Sunday 6 September 2015

Where on earth did he learn to do that ?

As many parents are traumatised by their little darlings starting reception this week I feel I may have taken a lackadaisical approach to Big Boy's impending launch into full time school life. To be fair he has been at the nursery for one year and we had all the 'starting big school' drama last summer. 

He has a fab teacher this year and I hope he will be happy. I am relieved we went through all the teething issues of starting school last year as I don't think I could have coped with them now we also have Baby Boy starting pre-school settling in days this week. 

Both my boys are pretty sociable and respond well to play and learning settings. They can find things to do and will engage in imaginative play as well as interact with other children which is wonderful to see and hear about. 

What I cannot get my head round is some of the strange capabilities Big Boy seems to have.

Yesterday at football he managed to persuade Daddy to give him some money then proceeded to 'buy' a bag of crisps for 20p at the shop using what I can only imagine were wiles or menaces ! 

He's clearly destined for a life of crime or a place on the Apprentice with those negotiating skills ! 

When we were on holiday at Coombe Mill I spotted a bite mark on Baby Boy's arm and asked Big Boy if he knew how it happened. He said he'd seen the whole thing and a donkey had bitten his brother. I said that was odd as the bite marks were too small for a donkey and he said, "Oh no it wasn't a donkey, it was a chicken." When I pointed out that a chicken has a beak and not human teeth he finally admitted it might have been him who did it. 

That is a criminal level of dishonesty. He is going to be a politician at this rate ! 

His ambition has gone from being a fire officer, to a police officer, a knight and then to wanting to be Prince Hans, "because he has a sword Mummy." I was becoming suspicious that he admired duplicity and cunning a bit too much, but now he wants to reach for the status of Master Yoda. Green and grammatically challenged that path may be, but a vast improvement it is. (See what I did there ?)

On a daily basis he will invent some partial truth that he makes sound so plausible I almost want to believe him even though I know it's complete baloney. He's had a secret jelly baby eating pact with Grandpa for over a year now, they have been in cahoots without me or Hubbie knowing. That is a disturbing amount of deception right there ! 

I'm not sure how helpful any of these skills will be in his school life, but I do hope that he manages to use his powers for good. I want to believe that he has the capacity to be a Captain Mal* character and to have good intentions even if his route to them is a little dubious. 

Let's face it, even Darth Vader had a mum, come to think of it so did Yoda. When they observed their sons I'm sure they had moments when they wondered what would become of their beloved boys too ? 

All I can do for now is ensure his shoes are shiny, his clothes have name tags in and that he's brushed his teeth and hair as he sets out on this new chapter. I will give him a supportive hug and whisper, "be careful out there' and chuckle to myself at the reference he won't get.**

If your little one is starting reception I hope it goes well and that you're not too upset by it. If you need a cuppa, a biccie and a virtual hug, I'll be here :) 

*if this reference is lost on you then google Firefly and give yourself a telling off for not knowing. 

**Hill Street Blues - seriously don't you watch any decent telly ? 

1 comment:

  1. I dread to think what occupation mine would chose at the moment - I am pretty sure middle man would say ninja