Mums know everything don't they ?

When I became a Mum I figured I'd just know stuff. Like my Mum does. She knows pretty much everything that's of any use to anyone. I always assumed that as soon as I had a child I'd automatically know stuff too. I am now, slowly, realising that it's taken raising 4 kids for her to gather that kind of wikipedia-esque skill.

So far here are the questions I can answer:

My boy: Mummy can I watch Gruffalo please ?

Hubbie: Where are my swimming trunks ?

The Cat: Miaoooooow (translation: something to do with biscuits)

All of them: When do we eat ?

The Questions I can't answer: 

Why did the cat lick Hubbie's marmite on toast yesterday morning ?

Why is it always the one thing that is most precious that my son will drop on the floor and break when he's at someone else's house ? (sorry Janice)

When will I work out how much less shampoo and conditioner to use now my hair is short ?

Why do the bin men always leave the wheelie bin right in the middle of the drive after emptying it ?

And to prove how useful my Mum really is - here is a small sample of questions she can answer:


"Mum how do I programme the economy 7 heating system ?

"Mum, how do I prepare and cook [name of exotic vegetable] ?"

"Mum what do I do with my son, he's not sleeping / eating / listening [delete as appropriate]"

"Mum how did you manage to run a household, raise 4 kids, work full time and prepare a meal from scratch every day ?"

and the questions my Mum can't answer:

"Mum, how do I get past this level on Candy Crush ?"

Personally, I don't see why she isn't running the world :o)